You are asking, how can one forgive and tolerate? Let’s see how the people, who have reached a sainthood, started and continued to grow in forgiving others.
Once I read that forgiveness has its levels. In other words there are levels, depending where you are in your spiritual journey, at which one forgives others differently.
For example, it’s said that holy people have a very high degree of forgiving others. They are not afraid that the forgiven person can cause any harm to them because it is written that “the One who was born of God keeps them safe, and the evil one cannot harm them” (1 John 5:18). This is why they forgive wholeheartedly. We are afraid to forgive because we think we will be seen as weak and we are afraid that the forgiven person may harm us again.
Saints are not afraid of this. They love God with all their hearts, minds, souls and strength this is why they are not afraid to forgive fully. And they are forgiven in the same way by God.
Those of you who are new to faith and trying to forgive your neighbor, a relative or a loved one, as a first step, do not think anything bad about that person. Do not wish him or her anything bad. Just leave it to God. Consider these steps as the lowest levels of forgiving another person. In the same time, if you see that person hungry, feed him. If you see that person thirsty, give him water. If you see that person sick, help him to recover. This may seem hard if you are trying to forgive that person for the wrong he/she has done to you. For this reason, in all these efforts pray and ask our Lord’s help. He tells us in John 15:5 that without him we can do nothing. But also teaches us that with God all things are possible (Matt. 19:26).
Forgiving is a liberating experience and is not hard if you do it with Christ. Apostle Paul teaches us that we can do all things with the one who gives us strength (Philip. 4:13).
And remember: “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matt. 6:14-15.
Let’s learn and practice forgiveness. Forgive one another and see how different life will become.